Dates on the 8's - Feature Image
Posted On 11/19/2013

Dates on the 8's

mom and amelia“If I could choose any little girl in the entire world…if they all lined up and I got to pick the one I wanted…I would choose you every time”.  I have been saying these words to my daughter her entire life, and they are so very true.  She is exactly what I would have dreamed my perfect daughter would be.  Sadly, I can’t recall anyone ever telling me that as a child.  I don’t remember ever being exactly what someone else wanted.  Although I’ve always wanted to be.  In fact, I feel quite certain that everyone wants to be exactly what someone else wants.  Am I right?  This is why young girls seek out the attention of the opposite sex.  They just want to be exactly what someone else wants, whatever that is.  Unfortunately often times what someone else wants is temporary and superficial and leaves us feeling empty.
How do we prevent our little girls from going there?  How do we instill such a sense of value in them that they never seek the wrong kind of attention?  Can we even do that?  I believe we can, but I also believe it requires purposeful action on our part.  This just doesn’t happen accidentally.
First of all, we need to teach our daughters about the love of Christ.  She needs to know that He loves her so much that He gave His life for her. Any man that wishes to marry her should be willing to do the same, and that’s Biblical, really.  Ephesians 5:25 says, “Husbands love your wives as Christ love the church and gave himself up for her”.  She is so special because God made her with His very own hands.  Psalm 139:14 says, “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made”.  Tell her over and over again that she is precious In His eyes, and show her the Bible as proof.
We often hear about how important it is for a little girl to have the heart of her Daddy.  His love and protection is so necessary for her development.  Yet the reality is that many little girls don’t have their Daddy at home with them, and this void is glaring.  For those girls who have a Daddy who lavishes her with love, this is a very good thing.  For those who don’t, all hope is not lost.  The Bible tells us that Jesus is a father to the fatherless. He can fill the void, but you have to lead her to Him. What seems impossible without Him is more than possible with Him.
We hear so much about Dad with Daddy-daughter dances, and Daddy dates, etc.  But what about Mom?  Should Mom have time alone with her daughter?  Absolutely.  In fact, many experts believe that this relationship is really the most important one for shaping how a girl will grow up to feel about herself.  Spending time with your daughter creates the foundation for a strong relationship in those difficult adolescent years.  Your family was not haphazardly put together, God gave you your daughter for a very specific reason. He has entrusted her to you, and you have something to pass on to her, something very important.  Your relationship with her is no accident.  So, purposefully build that relationship with her.  It will do her a world of good if you just take time to be with her.
I know that life gets busy and it seems like months go by and we haven’t spent an hour alone with our daughter, even thought we said we were going to.  This is why it is so important to schedule that time, as if it were a date.  I know this can be so hard to do, it has been for me.  My daughter is 11 and I know I cannot wait another moment to make it happen.  At an event for Mothers and daughters I saw how my daughter soaked up the moments we were together there and that is what made me decide that she and I needed to do something like that more regularly.
I asked her if she would want to do some ministry together, and she said yes! And Dates on the 8’s was born.  This is a once a month date night for Moms and daughters ages 8 to 18.  There’s no real format for these date nights.  Each one will be different, you may love one and have no interest in another, but the purpose is to carve out time for you and your little girl…or someone else’s little girl who desperately needs some time with a wonderful female role model.
The first Dates on the 8’s event is on December 8th, Cookies and Comedy.  My daughter chose this particular event and I can’t wait to do this with her.  The idea is that a mother/daughter team will hostess a table, decorate it, bring cookies and invite friends.  It’s simple, but requires planning together and being together.  My heart can’t wait to spend that time with her!  It honestly doesn’t matter what we do, just that we are doing it together.  Come join us!  Just complete the form below to sign up to be a hostess of a table.  I’ll email with all the info!

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